Thursday, February 26, 2009


Of course right after I post about being a Beta Mom, I have a total anxious mom moment. Paloma and Sabrina both have been a little bit of sleep trouble lately.

P is slipping back to early wake ups and had a little trouble going to sleep, but we've been doing a modified check and console-- she's 2.25-- and that's been working. S might be maybe teething, and has had much shorter naps and nap strikes, but today I've been dream feeding during naps and that's kept her sleeping! YAY!

Anyhoo. Paloma was napping yesterday afternoon, and it was a bit longer than usual. She usually goes down around 3 PM for an hour or hour and a half. Yesterday she went down around 4 PM and was still sleeping around 6:30 PM.

Ok, so lately she's been very enchanted to discover that she can climb out of her bed (converted crib) "all by herfelf." Yikes, there goes sleeptime, right? Right. So I've been worried she might slip and hit her head, twist something, or catch her eyeball on something and rip it out. (Why do I go there? WHY? WHY? Must stop.)

Anyhoo, hadn't heard anything on the monitor for 1.5 hours. So I turned it WAY up and held it to my ear to see if I could hear her breathing.

And that is the moment she chose to scream "MOOOOOM!!!!!!"

Wednesday, February 25, 2009

Beta Moms, Unite!

I was perusing thelactivist blog when I came across this post about Beta Moms. And I thought "Hooray! I can label myself!"

No really! I was happy because it means there's a group of mamas who I could hang with. We're the mamas who just don't want to be super-stressed. We want to enjoy this mothering thing without instilling ten zillion hang ups in our kids from the get go. (OMG I am already saying "we.")

Don't get me wrong-- Beta Moms (I suppose in contrast to [booming voice] ALPHA MOMS) want our kids to succeed. I want my kids to succeed! I just don't think I have to be a high-strung helicopter parent for that to happen. (I love that phrase, so descriptive-- the hovering parent is a helicopter.) I'm definitely an involved parent, as a WAHM. I'm definitely invested in helping my children fulfill their potential with grace and confidence.

But I'm not going to go gray and get all frowny and rude to make sure my daughter gets the starring role, or whatnot. Yes, I plan to help her with homework. No, I do not plan to do it for her. Yes, I will enroll her in a class or maybe two. No, I will not enroll her in daily enrichment.

See where I'm going? I think balance is key, and I feel like Derek and I have been pretty balanced in our parenting.

Friday, February 20, 2009

EC! or, you thought it was just poop

Sabrina has been consistently peeing and pooping when I hold her over the toilet and whisper "ssss" at her. She also smiles when I do that, which makes me laugh, which makes it all the more fun.

Ok but back to the peeing. Yeah I know can you believe it. She's really doing it! I've been taking her about once a day since birth pretty much. It is so awesome. Save a diaper at the least, get early potty training at best. Sounds great to me.

I'm not going to go much more hardcore than this on the elimination communication/diaper free thing. It's all good this way, we're making progress.

But her 2 year old sister Paloma-- I think when it gets warmer, we'll do the 3 day go-commando potty training method. Would luuuuurve to hear your success stories with that.

Saturday, February 07, 2009

the liberation of motherhood- that New Yorker article on pumping

Sonya Lunder wrote a really great blog at about that New Yorker article that has everyone all atwitter. It's about breastfeeding, pumping, and moms at work. The main argument of the article is not necessarily about whether whether pumping is better or worse than breastfeeding. The pros and cons are pretty well known by most moms who are dealing with this.

No, what's interesting here is that the author is asking us to step back a bit and ask why we're enabling pumping (to the extent that we're enabling it at all), but not (also) advocating harder for longer maternity leaves, which would definitely help lengthen breastfeeding relationships.

It's a good question. Most moms I know who pump would gladly exchange a few weeks (paid) at home nursing with their infant over a few weeks attached to a pump, hunched in a corner at work. It's a question of not losing pay, for most people.

Of course, there are those for whom the trip to the office is a needed and welcome break from their role as mother, validating for them their existence outside the home and in the world of adults. Some of these moms struggle with juggling the pump; some toss it altogether.

It's such a personal question, from mom to mom, of how to balance your needs with the little ones who need us to fulfill their needs. It comes down to choice, for me.

Here's the fundamental question: How much freedom do you have to mother the way you want to mother?

Do you feel chained to your job? Chained to your kid? Bound to a health insurance company that's giving you very little in return for very large portions of your income?

Here's an organization that's working (laboring!) to make mothering as liberating as possible:

Friday, February 06, 2009

when laughing goes too far

We were having a great time. Paloma was in bed and we were getting Sabrina ready to wind down too. I just finished nursing Sabrina and handed her over to Dada. She was standing on his lap, they were babbling at each other, and then PPHHHHHBBBTTTTT. She had a Giant Poopums.

We started laughing because she's so little yet she makes these great big toots, poops and burps. Sabrina, seeing the humor, started laughing too. And when Sabrina laughs, as you saw from the previous post, it's pretty hard not to laugh with her. She's charming that way.

So she laughed, we laughed, she laughed, we laughed. Then she squeaked. Then she milksploded all over Dada.

We still couldn't stop laughing. Well, I couldn't anyway. :)

Tuesday, February 03, 2009

Sabrina laughs!

Just for fun, here is some of Sabrina's earliest laughs!! SO CUTE. I turn into a ridiculous puddle every time.