Friday, May 12, 2006

Compassionate or sentimental?

Great article incisively taking apart television shows that are meant to make you "feel good" and perhaps like a good person for feeling good (ie, I must be compassionate to cry about this family getting a whole home makeover!!!.) But the show isn't really about compassion-- that it provokes a sentimental reaction is one thing, but does it simply provide a feel-good moment to the spectator, get ratings and ad dollars with not many substantial, long-term results? Clearly, most shows are not going to establish a relationship with the show participants or viewers, and then follow up and continue to walk with them after the cameras have stopped rolling. But wouldn't that be a more complete rendering of compassion, if compassion is truly "to suffer with"? As opposed to sentimentality, which begins and ends with the tv power button...

Tuesday, May 09, 2006

David Blaine

A couple of weeks ago D and I were at a hotel and saw David Blaine doing street magic. It was really fun to watch. But we don't have tv and so I haven't been following the David Blaine submersion too much; just noticing what I've seen mentioned on the web.

What I appreciate about him so much is how much people connect to him. From the comments I've read, people are buoyed by a sense of wonder. More than I would have guessed, people deeply appreciate that he does extreme things just to push himself and humankind. This is so interesting to me. People seem to feel a real sense of connection to him, to his creativity and mental feats, and to his commitment-- even while acknowledging that they themselves are not that committed, that they could not accomplish the same things. There are far fewer cynics and naysayers than I would have thought. I really like that!

It's like he relates to the world as an artist does *and* as an athlete does. That's fascinating to me.

Monday, May 08, 2006

the advice keeps a-comin'...

When people find out I'm pregnant, I get a lot of "OH! Well, enjoy doing [X activity] now because you sure won't be able to later!" They may as well add an evil "HA HA HA!!"

I usually feel like saying, "Well, duh. I expected my life would change, and actually I'm looking forward to it! But gee, thanks for the heads up." I mean, sure there will be days when I'm tired and want a few hours to myself. But the people commenting to me are usually so foreboding about the whole thing. Hey naysayers: Life is full of change all the time, whether or not you've got a child.

One friend, Jenny, was totally refreshing. She was so excited and we talked about all the things to look forward to. I got happy thinking about the plump little legs, the smiles, the nuzzling, and just generally mothering. Yeah, babies cry, it happens. But life rolls on, right? There are good times and hard times. Can't control it all, all the time.

Tuesday, May 02, 2006

15 weeks and risin'...

I keep thinking of that Johnny Cash song about the river that keeps rising as I progress in this pregnancy. 15 weeks is a good time in pregnancy, I'm finding! I had a fun ultrasound today. The little alien has feet. Looks like they're not going to be dainty little things! :) But we got a shot of one foot pressed up against the side of the uterus. It was cute. We couldn't tell the sex, and we're still not sure we want to find out. At the next appointment is when we have to decide. At first I was leaning toward finding out. After all, the docs know, the ultrasound tech knows... D and I should know! And we could call it by name in utero. And we could deal with any issues we might have around "oh my god how will I parent a little boy/girl?!"

But now I'm thinking, why does it matter as long as we know it's healthy? It's a rare chance to love someone without knowing their sex, which could be interesting in terms of learning more about our subconscious and conscious approaches to people because of their sex. That is, our biases! I'm less into the "surprise" of it. I really think labor and delivery will be surprise enough. !! But it could be fun too, to surprise everyone else with "Meet our new daughter/son!" And we've talked so much about how we want to raise a child, whether it's a boy or girl, that we know that (at least for the first couple of years), things would likely be done much the same for either sex.

Leave a message if you've thought through this decision! Thanks!