Sabrina has been ... entering full-on two year old mode, shall we say. And by full-on two year old mode, I mean that thing where they want everything at once: to be independent AND dependent, alone AND with you, etc.
So Sabrina was doing her thing, hanging on and occasionally flailing and sometimes smacking into me, and I was tired and getting thirsty and just needed a moment of peace.
And that's when she grabbed my glass of heaven (water with a splash of mango lemonade) and drank out of it. And I think I must have sighed really heavily or said something like, "Let's get you your own cup!" or something that signaled that I wasn't sharing.
Because then Paloma decided to pipe up in support of her sister. "You should SHARE, mama."
And really? REALLY? After countless days and nights of never-ending work, now I'm getting sharing advice from my four year old? I probably should have taken this as a good sign that she learned about sharing. Right? It's probably good-- no, great!-- that she didn't say, "Yeah, forget her. Drink that up-- it's all yours!" She was encouraging me to share, she learned her lesson well, and I could be proud of her.
But nope. I wasn't in the frame of mind to appreciate her admonition. Instead, what I said was, "I shared my BODY with both of you for like 10 MONTHS."
And you know what she said? "No, I really think it was only 3 months."
And Derek, who was doing dishes and listening, just broke down laughing. Between tears of laughter, he said, "Yeah, you know, well. You both were there-- who do I believe?" He knocked it off when I made like I was going to throw the glass at his giant head. 10 months inside each, buddy, not to mention over three years of breastfeeding between the two of them.
"I really think it was only 3 months." Yeah-- that was my PIG NEWTON moment. Please to click the link to gawker and watch Louis CK's brilliance. I couldn't embed the video here so you'll just have to click over (HEY WHOA it's Not Safe For Work friends).
Then come on back and share your own Pig Newton moment. If you know a 3-4 year old, perhaps you know what I'm talking about yes?